My baby flew to California today, returning to college and the Boyfriend. Here's where Kalei is now...

What a difference a year makes! Her winter break in Hawaii last year was one big stressful conflagration for her from start to finish, involving underage drinking, a court date, community service, health problems, nicotine dependence, and many moments of defensiveness and conflict with the parents. This year by contrast, she was mostly delighted and delightful, transformed into a motivated and successful student, rattling on enthusiastically for hours about the details of botany, now her major. Maturation and happiness leaves her far more patient and loving with us, and willing just to hang out with her family. Equally amazing was a new willingness to explore her inner space. In the calm that followed one rough melt-down, a post-teenage tantrum, when she was ready to run out and reach for a nicotine fix, I suggested we go to Hilo's only kava bar for a little harm reduction, and then dared to ask "What do you think made you so angry?" Rather than letting her psyche head for the hills to escape the painful moment, she stopped and reflected on what was at the root of the powerful emotion-fueled outburst, performing self-therapy in my presence with an almost scientific interest in furthering her own psychological development.